Doctor pagal se- Ye kya hai?
Pagal- Ye maine 500 panno ki kitab likhi hai...
Doctr- Tumne 500 panno pe kya likha?
Pagal- Ye maine 500 panno ki kitab likhi hai...
Doctr- Tumne 500 panno pe kya likha?
Showing posts with label Doctor Patient Jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Doctor Patient Jokes. Show all posts
Breathing
Doctor, Doctor I'm having trouble with my breathing.
I'll give you something that will soon put a stop to that!
I'll give you something that will soon put a stop to that!
New glasses
Doctor: You need new glasses.
Patient: How do you know? I haven't told you whats wrong with me yet.
Doctor: I could tell as soon as you walked in through the window!
Patient: How do you know? I haven't told you whats wrong with me yet.
Doctor: I could tell as soon as you walked in through the window!
Fish and Chip shop
Doctor, Doctor I think I need glasses.
You certainly do, Sir, this is a fish and chip shop!
You certainly do, Sir, this is a fish and chip shop!
Watch
Doctor: You seem to be in excellent health. Your pulse is as regular as clockwork.
Patient: That's because you've got your hand on my watch!
Patient: That's because you've got your hand on my watch!
Meri Skin
Girl doctor says:. meri skin bohat soft, mulaayem, sensitive hay or rang bohat gora hay .....sonay se pehlay kya laga k soya karun…?
Doctor: “kundi”(Lock)
True Love
Three men were drinking at a bar - a doctor, an attorney
and a biker. As the doctor was drinking his white wine he said, "For
her birthday, I'm going to buy my wife a fur coat and a diamond ring.
This way, if she doesn't like the fur coat she will still love me
because she got a diamond ring. "
As the attorney was drinking his martini he said, "For my wife's
birthday, I'm going to buy her a designer dress and a gold bracelet.
This way, if she doesn't like the dress she will still love me because
she got the gold bracelet. "
As the biker was drinking his shots of whiskey he said, "I'm going to
buy my wife a T-shirt and a vibrator. This way, if she doesn't like
the T-shirt she can go fuck herself! "
and a biker. As the doctor was drinking his white wine he said, "For
her birthday, I'm going to buy my wife a fur coat and a diamond ring.
This way, if she doesn't like the fur coat she will still love me
because she got a diamond ring. "
As the attorney was drinking his martini he said, "For my wife's
birthday, I'm going to buy her a designer dress and a gold bracelet.
This way, if she doesn't like the dress she will still love me because
she got the gold bracelet. "
As the biker was drinking his shots of whiskey he said, "I'm going to
buy my wife a T-shirt and a vibrator. This way, if she doesn't like
the T-shirt she can go fuck herself! "
Tom Jones
Aman goes to doctor and tells him that he is worried because he thinks he is Tom Jones.
The doctor replies "Don't worry, its not unusual"
The doctor replies "Don't worry, its not unusual"
Medicine For Cold
"My doctor told me to take something for my cold."
"What did you take?"
"His Coat!"
"What did you take?"
"His Coat!"
Eye Problem
Patient to the eye doctor: "Whenever I drink coffee, I have this sharp, excruciating pain."
"Try to remember to remove the spoon from the cup before drinking."
"Try to remember to remove the spoon from the cup before drinking."
No Confusion Please
"Doctor, are you sure I'm suffering from pneumonia? I've heard once about a doctor treating someone with pneumonia and finally he died of typhus."
"Don't worry, it won't happen to me. If I treat someone with pneumonia he will die of pneumonia."
"Don't worry, it won't happen to me. If I treat someone with pneumonia he will die of pneumonia."
Cure My Husband
Wife: Doctor My husband thinks he's a satellite dish.
Doctor: Don't worry I can cure him.
Wife: I don't want him cured I want you to adjust him to get the movie channel.
Doctor: Don't worry I can cure him.
Wife: I don't want him cured I want you to adjust him to get the movie channel.
Good Treatment
Nurse: Doctor, the man you've just treated collapsed on the front step what should I do?
Doctor: Turn him around so it looks like he was just arriving!
Doctor: Turn him around so it looks like he was just arriving!
What A Treatment!
A guy walks into work, and both of his ears are all bandaged up.
The boss says, "What happened to your ears?"
He says, "Yesterday I was ironing a shirt when the phone rang and shah! I accidentally answered the iron."
The boss says, "Well, that explains one ear, but what happened to your other ear?"
He says, "Well, jeez, I had to call the doctor!"
The boss says, "What happened to your ears?"
He says, "Yesterday I was ironing a shirt when the phone rang and shah! I accidentally answered the iron."
The boss says, "Well, that explains one ear, but what happened to your other ear?"
He says, "Well, jeez, I had to call the doctor!"
Bad and Worse
Doctor: I have some bad news and some very bad news.
Patient: Well, might as well give me the bad news first.
Doctor: The lab called with your test results. They said you have 24 hours to live.
Patient: 24 HOURS! That's terrible! WHAT could be WORSE? What's the very bad news?
Doctor: I've been trying to reach you since yesterday.
Patient: Well, might as well give me the bad news first.
Doctor: The lab called with your test results. They said you have 24 hours to live.
Patient: 24 HOURS! That's terrible! WHAT could be WORSE? What's the very bad news?
Doctor: I've been trying to reach you since yesterday.
Phoolo ki mala
Mareez:-doctor aap ye phoolo ki mala kyon laaye hain?
Doctor:-ye mera pahla operation hai,agar safal hua to mere liye nahin to tuhare kaam aaegi.
Doctor:-ye mera pahla operation hai,agar safal hua to mere liye nahin to tuhare kaam aaegi.
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